Thursday, June 2, 2016
Kendall Ryan Books/May 23, 2016
It’s not what I really want, but it’s all he has to offer. He’s filled with turmoil and heartache and regrets, but for two hours every Wednesday all he feels is me. How much I desire him, how desperate he makes me, how much I’d like things to be different between us. Real.
He used to be my best friend back before he got married. And now? Now, he’s a young widower. It would be wrong on so many levels to expect something more from him, so I give him what he needs. Dark, delicious fucking.
But I know I can’t keep this up. I’ve already given him my body, my soul. I want him to have my heart. It might drive him away forever, but that’s a risk I’m willing to take.
Wednesday is an angsty romp told from dual points of view. If you’re in the mood for something quick and dirty, you’ve found it. Proceed at your own risk.
Wednesday is a quick read, 107 pages according to Goodreads. The hero and heroine have known each other since they were children so they have a long, established history. Calling Shaw a hero is a stretch. Three times in my notes I used derogatory language when referring to him. It was ass, asshat and asshole. I was not a Shaw fan.
Chloe is Shaw's best friend and wants to be there for him. I totally get that. But he uses her. There's no other way to put it. He knows it. She knows it. He shows up at her place every Wednesday and they fuck. There's no other way to put it. They fuck, he dresses and leaves. It's physical for him. When we get Shaw's point of view, he tries to explain why he does this. He knows he is using her and he even agrees with my opinion of him being an ass. He says he needs her to fill the emptiness. As if he doesn't have her, he might fall apart and their physical connection is all he has to hold on to. It does make sense, in a way. He has so many emotions to deal with from his wife's death that he doesn't want to deal with any more. Instead, he only wants a physical release. But the fact that he knows he is only using Chloe, that is what bothered me. This is his best friend, someone he cares about. Even after he admits his mistakes and does some groveling, I'm still not a Shaw fan.
Chloe has been in love with Shaw for years. She doesn't think he reciprocates until he makes it very clear he wants to have sex with her. But that's all it is. I think she convinced herself that she was okay with that because she wanted to help him in any way she could. It took months of sex before she finally realizes she can't stand having the physical without the emotional. It had become too painful to be so close physically to Shaw but have him so distant emotionally. So I will give her points for trying to break off their destructive relationship.
I'm still not sure how I feel about this novella. I didn't like Shaw, obviously, and I wasn't a huge Chloe fan either. I liked her but thought she should have treated herself better. Rather than letting the sex go on with Shaw for so long when it was hurting her so much, she should have put a stop to it much sooner. She deserved better than his treatment of her.
The book did make me think. I wonder if this happens more often than we think. You have a group of friends, some closer than others. Some single, some married and suddenly one of them finds themselves a widower/widow. How do you help them through it? We all would probably say by being there for them. But what if they need something more physical and you want to give in but are conflicted with the situation? There was certainly the feeling of guilt for both Shaw and Chloe. Would we feel guilty for giving in and then wanting more? This actually sounds like a movie.
This novella did elicit a few strong emotions from me but in the end, I found the frustration with the hero and heroine too much of a roadblock to enjoying their story.